Saturday, August 23, 2008

baby boomers and parenting during s articles

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Thursday, August 21, 2008

How to turn a troubled kid into a cool kid

by Tony Hanes

This is number 1 of the beginning of a top 10 list of how to change a rowdy kid into kid you want to be around.
Control;

There is a difference between boundaries and control. As a parent you have to have boundaries for your child. But what you must accept if your influence has diminished with your child is that the more controled your kids feel, the more they are going to fight you. This is not because they are evil, it is a natural impetus of maturing. It simply isn't in the human condition to feel powerless or manipulated and not resist. Relinquish the control aspect of your parenting immediately. Introduce freedom with consequences.

Get your mind in gear with this idea and give your kid a speech along the lines of this.

You are free to go to your friends house and wear that gothic outfit if you wish and I will empower you to take more control of your own life. You will not however endanger your life or anyone else's or I will intervene. You are now responsible for all your actions and consequences, be that at school or with the law. You are on your on with any trouble you get into. I love you so much, and there are a lot of things you do that I can not accept right now, but you are my child and I will always accept you. You want responsibility for your own actions, and your own life and I understand that now. And maybe I should not have tried to keep you under so much control as I have. I am going to give you your freedom now. There will still be some boundaries so that I can assure your safety. We wont fight about these boundaries, we will just do them. I want you to make me proud of you. I'm sure you will make some mistakes, and if you do, the consequences will fall on your shoulders, not mine. I'm not doing this because I'm giving up on you, I'm doing this because I love you so much that I want you to have the freedom I know you need.

As a parent if that idea makes your skin crawl, then maybe you should re evaluate how well the idea of total control has been working for you. The bottom line is that parents learn best how to parent after their kids are all grown up. And part of that lesson most all parents learn in the grandparent phase is that trying to control a child is only counter productive. Some kids will smoke a little pot. Some kids will wear the craziest clothes that we parents just cant stand. Some kids have friends that we parents dont even want to be seen with.

You have to let go of the idea of what you thought your child would be, of who you thought they would be. BIG SURPRISE ... they have their own personality and it has nothing to do with your genetics or how your parents raised you. Let them experiment with who they are with their music, their clothes and even their friends. If you don't, then you are going to have an 18 year old who hasn't sorted these things out yet, and now has a huge attitude towards any authority figures, and maybe rightly so.



About the Author
Tony Hanes, Author Baboo Says - A Life Manual for Kids http://www.baboosays.com

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

impact of single parenting and education of child

Being a single parent comes in itself with challenges. As an advisor, single parents often ask what mistakes they must avoid their parenting adolescents. Many single parents are concerned about all the consequences of their divorce, which could negatively affect their youth. Here are some common errors to avoid: Error 1: Lying to them Honesty is always the best, especially parenting adolescents. First, today 's adolescents are quite intuitive and know when they are cheated. In addition, dishonesty only destroyed confidence, which is something that is needed the most during this transitional time. Error 2: Prevention of discipline Wherever there is a lack of any discipline, there is manipulation. Dictionary.com provides this definition of discipline, "The training has included producing a character or a specific mode of behaviour, which produces particularly exerted improvement." moral or mental; Note the emphasis on the improvement rather than punishment. Error 3: Eliminate any structure or routine Divorce is a transitional time for everyone involved. Each person 's routine is compromised. A family environment filled with structured routines and chores provides a sense of order and property. This is particularly beneficial where chaos resulting from divorce. Error 4: Forget them as single parent, you are forced to use many hats and fill many different roles - often simultaneously. Furthermore, you are in the middle of the test to provide a stable family environment, work full time, and recover from the emotional adjustment of a being a single parent. In the midst of this, I encourage you to find some time to be intentional time to spend with your teen on a regular basis. Help them to see that you are available to them, and concerned about all the needs they may have. Error 5: Continue to fight with your former spouse If a report has been turbulent marriage, but many adolescents provide for a divorce will cause a sense of peace if necessary. However, if the conflict continues after the divorce has been completed while your teen may experience some difficulty adjusting to the emotional divorce. As much as you can, try to keep all your cordial discussions with a former spouse and concentrated on your teen. Error 6: Don 't they get any help from outside Divorce can affect adolescents of many different ways. Some may open with emotion and sharing their feelings freely. However, others may withdraw from family and friends and become réclusifs. Others may come in a few behavioural problems which may not have been there before. If you have concerns about how your teen gets divorce me and then encourage you to seek qualified professional advisor. Error 7: N'assumer nothing is wrong parenting Another common mistake is to assume that your teenager has been completely untouched by divorce. There seem quiet lives as if the divorce is a minor incident in the tapestry of their lives. And this applies to many adolescents. However, there are others who give the appearance that everything is fine, when in fact the opposite is the case. They can do this to save face for them, or they may react this way to give their parents a less thing to worry about. Communicate with your teen on an ongoing basis about his feelings about their new life and its challenges.
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Sunday, August 17, 2008

Teach Your Kids about Election Day

by Paul Banas

As this interminable 2008 election whimpers on into the fall, our family has at least used it to teach a few civics lessons to our two young children.

The success of the first viable female and African-American candidates, of course, has been much bally-hooed for their significance. As adults, we appreciate what paradigm shifting events mean within the context of history.

Four years ago, when my daughter was only four, I asked her if she wanted to be President one day. She immediately responded, "That's silly, daddy. Girls can't be President." It's not that she isn't exposed to strong women, but, on a media-savvy world, she had yet to see a woman running for President on TV or YouTube. For a parent, hearing your kids already slamming doors to possibilities at such an early age is an extremely painful thing. I immediately told her that everything was possible, though felt my arguments were weakened by the lack of empirical evidence that would convince a small child. We've talked a lot more since then about strong women leaders. We never miss the chance to point out a woman in a position of power.

As a consequence, I've been dealing with my daughter's undying support of Hillary. If she were a bit older, she would be writing vicious letters to the editor complaining about the loss of her "girl-power" candidate. Like some other Democrat hold-outs, she still hasn't decided whether she can let go of her passionate support for the "girl candidate" and shift her allegiance to Mr. Obama.

In our house, we're addicted to political news and our kids know who we consider "idiots" and "bozos." I'm very proud they can recognize several world leaders even in editorial page caricatures. They tend to remember the ones we mock and decry them most, however. A good resolution for us will be to teach them to recognize also the heroes in world affairs.

We all vote together as a family and this Election Day will be no different. In California, as in most states, you can take your kids right into the polling booth with you and they can see up close what citizenship is really like. I remember, as a child, thinking that voting would be one of the coolest things about being an adult. This wasn't out of some precocious understanding of the workings of democracy. I had some notion that the big booth with the huge lever and sliding curtain was some kind of Rube Goldberg-style pinball machine and that there must be some mighty fine entertainment within the confines of that little room.

Voting in San Francisco is a bit more pedestrian: no booth and giant lever, but just an ordinary felt pen and long text paragraphs of indecipherable resolutions. Still, I bring the kids in with me and I'll hoist the four year old on my shoulders so he can watch what I'm doing. He won't understand too much of it, but that's okay. Like a lot of parenting, the lesson will be in the doing. Good habits start young, and I'd like to believe that my kids, like me, will have a hard time skipping out on the joys of citizenship, like the simple act of voting.



About the Author
Paul Banas is a founder of GreatDad.com. He writes articles on child development, parenting styles, fatherhood, parenting tips and many more topics related to dads.

Friday, August 15, 2008

How to Raise a Responsible Child

by Ron P. Maier

Responsibility is a very important skill that children must learn. It teaches them respect, self-preservation, dedication and how to have pride in themselves. Many parents try to teach responsibility by giving their children chores and punishing them if the chores are not completed. While this may be part of the strategy, it leaves out the important lessons that responsibility should teach. Having your child do chores with the threat of punishment teaches them that this is something that they have to do to stay out of trouble. Your goal in teaching responsibility should include teaching self-esteem and self-pride. If you teach your child to be proud of what they have accomplished, then the lesson is more likely to stick. Also, they will take this lesson with them into adulthood and parenthood. Consider how the lessons you teach your child will affect them in the workplace when they are grown. If you have taught them to do the bare minimum to keep out of trouble, then they will only do the bare minimum at their job just to keep from getting fired. If you teach them to be proud of the work that they do and you reward them for doing a good job, then they will want to excel in the workplace. This can create a lifetime of opportunity for them. Challenging your children is also an important part of teaching responsibility. Raising children that love a challenge can be one of your greatest parenting achievements! Keep chores exciting and add on special bonuses each week to boost enthusiasm about what could be a mundane task. For example, if cleaning the bathroom is part of the chore list, add on extra incentives for cleaning the floor behind the toilet, or wiping down the baseboards. Offer to double the payout for organizing bathroom cabinets, cleaning the toothpaste tube underneath the cap, or disinfecting doorknobs and light switches. Children enjoy special awards and stickers as well as monetary rewards. Beyond normal chores and reward systems, teach your child that it is more fun to work as a team. Have your children help you fold laundry and make up little poems, songs and dances while you do it. Do not let them in on the fact that you may loathe doing the laundry! Make up folding challenges that can allow your child to earn special childrens hangers, such as beaded Glam Hangers or kids Slim-Line Hangers. Teaching your children to want to succeed can have a big impact on their lives.


About the Author
About the Author: Ron Maier is the owner of Only Kids Hangers, a leading provider of childrens hangers. The right childrens clothes hangers really make the difference in kid's retail or home organization. For more information, please visit www.onlykidshangers.com.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

single parenting effects | single parenting statistics | single mothers

There are many different aspects of parenting that as the alternative parenting, including the parenting of Christian, the cheerful parenting and the alternate parenting qualify. Each of these are somewhat prescriptive in that they hold ranges imply that parents treat their children, but many of the details can lead to move into the hearts and the views of opponents. Whether or not the debate that, cheerful and alternate which surrounds Christian parenting parenting parenting is necessary is irrelevant because it does exist and we are flooded with it.

The rights of Parenting here tends to be the biggest issue. Who has the right to be a parent? What makes someone a good parent? Did the parents' rights? Each of these questions will constantly a fundamental part of the marriage and familiedebatten in North America. The reality is, however, that many people are not the answers to these parenting rechtenvragen. Furthermore, many people don 't seem to indicate. While the parenting of Christian and the cheerful parenting may seem to be polar opposites, they are often greeted by opposition in the public arena because of the controversial views that exist. While one hand, the opponents of Christian parenting their opinions on the notion that vocalize the parenting of the Christian onderwijskinderen a "implies; mythology" at a very young age without choices to offer, they also argue that these parenting approach traditionally strong value systems in children expresses. The same two-pronged feeling that confuses is expressed to the parents of homosexual beliefs.

One the one hand, many people seem to understand that the intrinsically doubtful two people homosexual parents can be. On one hand, people also think that the only requirement of a marriage and a family relationship for the two people of compassion in relation to each other and fit into his. In that respect, we would assume that the perspective in terms of the cheerful parenting seems a little bit contradictory. The alternate parenting is another issue that is often thrown into the mix is that of Christian parenting and the cheerful parenting influences. The alternate parenting is the controversial practice of figuring out a ship for a child to be transported to childbirth and then passing of the child to another age. Many people have objections against this practice because they like being "View; baby farming". This objection is typically just on the heels of the statement that a leenmoeder one of tederst giving women in the world because it gives her own body. This confusing position is more evidence in relation to confuse the arena of debate that the various types of the controversial parenting surrounds. The parenting of Christian, the cheerful parenting and the alternate parenting are all heksentoeren. Let 's face it, the parenting hard enough without having compatible creeping know-some of it is that the details of public debate in the war. Instead of concentrating on the various social issues that families in North America surround, there is a need to commit themselves together and to concentrate on the facts.

The Christian parenting is no different than the cheerful parenting in the sense that the ultimate goal is always the same.

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Tuesday, August 5, 2008

3 Parenting Tips ~ Using "Love Talk" with Your Partner

by Jean Tracy, MSS

"Ultimately the bond of all companionship, whether in marriage or in friendship, is conversation." - Oscar Wilde -

Whether it was a long time ago or recently, you promised to love, honor, and cherish your spouse. That includes the way you talk with each other. Perhaps you've slipped into disrespectful patterns. Maybe you just need a few ideas to lift up your conversations. Use the tips inside to boost your "love talk."

3 Parenting Tips that Build Character and Increase Love:

B>Look Each Other in the Eye When You Speak ~

It's so easy to talk without looking at your spouse. Maybe you do this while working on the car, washing the dishes, or eating dinner. If you're talking without looking, don't be surprised if your spouse is daydreaming.

Make your spouse feel special and important. Give your partner your full attention. Start with talking, looking, and listening today. Eye to eye contact is definitely worth the effort.

Practice Taking Turns When Speaking ~

Take turns with the "microphone." When one partner broadcasts and the other just listens, "love talk" flies out the window. Let's face it, nonstop talkers are boring. Silent partners are too. Practice listening and talking. Create your bond of companionship with mutual conversation.

See Things from Your Partner's Perspective ~

To be close to someone is to know what they think and feel. You don't have to agree. You don't need to argue either. You do need to understand. To show you understand, repeat your partner's words in your own way. Ask if you've got it right. If not, try again.

To be understood is what we all want. Take turns repeating each other's ideas when you converse. Find out if you're correct. Keep the "love talk" flowing.

Parenting Tips Conclusion:

Imagine your spouse looking at you with interest when you're speaking. Discover the interaction when you share the microphone. Feel the closeness when you truly know how each other thinks and feels. Speaking and listening with interest and respect is "Love Talk." Increase your companionship with your conversation.

Your children are watching. They'll copy you. Start building their character by modeling "love talk" today.

About the Author
Jean Tracy, MSS publishes a Free Parenting Newsletter. Subscribe at http://www.KidsDiscuss.com and receive 80 fun activities to share with your kids.